It's the holiday season

For those of you who don't know me that well, I love all things festive. The end of the year is one of my favorites because it is filled with reasons to decorate your house in all kinds of festive colors and sparkly things (all tastefully done of course. . .well, I do appreciate that other people do it up tacky so I can partake, but I guess I just don't have that much gumption)

Anyway, some people may think the holiday season doesn't start until Thanksgiving. At the earliest, an even smaller percentage might think that it starts with Halloween. Well, in my book you all would be wrong. The holiday season actually started two weeks ago with the first kick-off of a college footbal game.

To me football season marks the beginning of getting dressed up to party with friends and celebrate something you love. To those of you who don't get it, I know I can never get you to understand, but to those of you who do you know there are no words that can do it justice. And with all things festive, entertaining, and traditional, we just do it better in the South.

There's something about football in the South. I am sure that other people in the country get so tired of hearing us go on and on about our favorite past time, but we can't help it. College football is just a way of life for so many of us. Other parts of the country may be good at it. They may enjoy it, but we do it like no one else.

Other people don't get why we dress up to go to the game. They see us on national tv and think the girls dressed up in our party dresses and nice clothes; the boys in their ties and button downs must be crazy. They don't get it.

As with all things in the South, we are proud of our traditions. We do not let go of them quickly. We dress up because our parents did; our grandparents did. Heck, their great grandparents probably did. I remember my momma talking about wearing a coursage to the games many years ago. And that's why we do it.

To us, college football is part of our great tradition. Its something we are proud of. Its something that unites generations. It brings families together, and because of that, when we go, we like to look our best. You wouldn't show up somewhere that meant a lot to you in your pajamas would you?

I like the way this sums it up. (Yeah, I'm sure I've already sent it to most of you, but when something is good, it is good.)

In case you weren't aware, there are just a few differences between football in the South and the North.

Women's Accessories:

NORTH:

ChapStick in back pocket and a $20 bill in the front pocket.

SOUTH:

Louis Vuitton duffel with two lipsticks, waterproof mascara, and a fifth of bourbon. Money is not necessary... that's what dates are for.
Stadium Size:

NORTH:

College football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

SOUTH:

High school football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

Fathers:

NORTH:

Expect their daughters to understand Sylvia Plath.

SOUTH:

Expect their daughters to understand pass interference.

Campus Decor:

NORTH:

Statues of founding fathers.

SOUTH:

Statues of Heisman trophy winners.

Homecoming Queen:

NORTH:

Also a physics major.

SOUTH:

Also Miss America.

Heroes:

NORTH:

Rudy Guliani
SOUTH:

Archie & Peyton Manning

Getting Tickets:

NORTH:

5 days before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus and purchase tickets.

SOUTH:

5 months before the game you walk into the ticket office on Campus and put name on waiting list for tickets.
Friday Classes After a Thursday Night Game:

NORTH:

Students and teachers not sure they're going to the game, because they have classes on Friday.

SOUTH:

Teachers cancel Friday classes because they don't want to see the few hung-over students that might actually make it to class.
Parking:

NORTH:

An hour before game time, the University opens the campus for game parking.

SOUTH:

RVs sporting their school flags begin arriving on Wednesday for the weekend festivities. The really faithful arrive on Tuesday.
Game Day:

NORTH:

A few students party in the dorm and watch ESPN on TV.

SOUTH:

Every student wakes up, has a beer for breakfast, and rushes over to where ESPN is broadcasting "Game Day Live" to get on camera and wave to the idiots up North who wonder why "Game Day Live" is never broadcast from their campus.
Tailgating:

NORTH:

Raw meat on a grill, beer with lime in it, listening to local radio station with truck tailgate down.

SOUTH:

30-foot custom pig-shaped smoker fires up at dawn. Cooking accompanied by live performance by "Dave Matthews' Band," who come over during breaks and ask for a hit off bottle of bourbon.
Getting to the Stadium:

NORTH:

You ask "Where's the stadium?" When you find it, you walk right in.

SOUTH:

When you're near it, you'll hear it. On game day it becomes the state's third largest city.

Concessions:

NORTH:

Drinks served in a paper cup, filled to the top with soda.

SOUTH:

Drinks served in a plastic cup, with the home team's mascot on it, filled less than half way with soda, to ensure enough room for bourbon.
When National Anthem is Played:

NORTH:

Stands are less than half full, and less than half of them stand up.

SOUTH:

100,000 fans, all standing, sing along in perfect four-part harmony.

The Smell in the Air After the First Score:

NORTH:

Nothing changes.

SOUTH:

Fireworks, with a touch of bourbon.

Commentary (Male):

NORTH:

"Nice play."

SOUTH:

"Dammit, you slow sumbitch -tackle him and break his legs."

Commentary (Female):

NORTH:

"My, this certainly is a violent sport."

SOUTH:

"Dammit, you slow sumbitch - tackle him and break his legs."

Announcers:

NORTH:

Neutral and paid.

SOUTH:

Announcer harmonizes with the crowd in the fight song, with a tear in his eye because he is so proud of his team.
After the Game:

NORTH:

The stadium is empty way before the game ends.

SOUTH:

Another rack of ribs goes on the smoker. While somebody goes to the nearest package store for more bourbon, planning begins for next week's game.

This weekend I am off to a great tradition in the Southland: USC vs. Georgia. This year Georgia is ranked second in the country going into the game, and my beloved Gamecocks gave away the game to an unranked Vanderbilt team last week. But as with all great rivalries, when the first whistle blows all bets are off until the clock hits the four zeroes. Then, and only then will the dust finally settle enough to proclaim a victor.

Maybe the ranked team will win. That's what most people are calling for. Maybe South Carolina will choke again, like we are known to do. But maybe, just maybe, it will be one of those magical fall afternoons when the air is blowing just right, the stars align themselves and the underdog comes out of no where to take home the victory.

I will hopefully have a report and some pictures for you Monday.

Until, let me leave you with this. . .

U-S-C GO COCKS!!!